Friday, April 20, 2018

Trouser trouble


The quest for a good pair of trousers continues. Buying clothes when you've two wardrobes is an odd experience.

What I mean is, when it comes to bloke's troos, there's a few basic rules: long enough, wide enough, and do they suit? If you're young and hip you don't want dad jeans, and if you're a dad, you don't want dad trousers either. ;-) Well, at least not obviously.

With women's trousers, there's a myriad of styles, sizes, and lengths, that seem to come and go so quickly. The size thing is particularly troublesome. From Shop A, the 16s were the right length, but just the wrong side of tight on my waist. The size 18 pair from Shop B was too long (despite being cropped) and even with a belt, too wide. Sigh.... :-)

As a simple brained trans-something-or-other, I think I get why women take so much time shopping. Sure, some may like it, some may hate it, but whichever it is, it ain't easy!

So no, I don't complain when the Ever Lovely Mrs J takes umpteen minutes in the charging room and comes out empty handed.

Oh, and I think I get why leggings are so popular :-D

Take care,

Friday, April 13, 2018

Helping in little ways


After a week or two of zero trans related activity, two things come along at once. If it helps, feel free to imagine a pair of Clapham omnibus rolling in. Tickets ready? Ding ding! :-)

Bus 1

Earlier in the week, it was time for a training event in Nottingham. I'd arranged it some time ago and managed to squeeze it in my lunch hour. I try not to swing the lead too much when I'm at work. I may not have the best record for timekeeping, but I like to think I put my all in when I'm in. Well, that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it! ;-)

I called just before setting off to make sure everything was still on. The lady who'd requested the training - we'll call her 'B' - was a little surprised when I introduced myself as Richard. "We were expecting, Lynn. Is she not coming?" Cue a quick apology around names, given that mostly I'm Richard, except when I'm not. That seemed to do the trick and it was all systems go.

I've ditched the PowerPoint slides after the last event seemed to go very well just using a whiteboard and we talked through a few key ideas. This worked for this team too and they asked some great questions. Given the coaching training at work, I'm trying to make this much more reflective and get the teams' view on things, rather than me stand there and talk. I think it's the answers they give and the conclusions they arrive at that add the value. At least, I hope so.

For a brief moment, my guard was completely down and I forgot I was in Richard mode if that makes sense. Less of the feeling slightly not quite dressed appropriately. Maybe it was because the group (all women) were so welcoming, that it happened. I sort of snapped back (mentally) and my brain played through the idea of me sat there as Lynn. Perhaps going back to B's original comment on the phone. Not that that was on the cards, not on a workday and not with the kids off for school.

They seemed satisfied with the group discussion and as I left, I remembered a few things I didn't cover. Still, you can't cover everything, and maybe these items were relevant. I might not have made the Transgender Day of Visibility (TDOV), but in my own little way, I'm trying. Wittier people may say 'very' before that, but they'll not be on my Xmas card list. ;-)

Bus 2

After that just-a-bit-too-long-between-meetings gap was over, it was time for Chameleons. I was torn between jeans and a pretty top, or dress and heels. Given the weather, I opted for the dress and a cardie (see right).

Now, I've been using a pop-sock as a wig cap for a while, so I thought it was best to buy the proper thing and try that. I keep my natural hair pretty short, so come the end of the evening, I tend to have the telltale lines on my scalp due to the wig.

I unwrapped and carefully pulled on said wig cap. So far, so good. Hair combed, wig on, and downstairs I went. I forget who I was talking to, but I could feel the cap begin to slide off my head and retreat under my wig! Luckily, the conversation came to a natural close as the other party popped out for a brew. As I stood up, I felt the cap scurry over my scalp and ball up under my wig at the top of my head. Whoops! I headed off to the bathroom to adjust. Luckily I did not look like I was sporting a 60s do / Mars Attacks stylee. :-)

I had a good chat with the regulars, although poor Val was ill, so she had to duck out early (get well soon, Mrs!). I did have a long-ish talk with a new member and she was kind enough to say some very nice things about the group. I hope the others have read that too, because I think that really shows we can make a difference.

Reasons to be cheerful, eh?

Take care,