Friday, November 07, 2014

Nine years later

Hi,

Once more into the Blogger interface, dear friends, once more. I could continue to torture that fine piece of English writing, but probably best not too. :-)

Holiday

I've missed a week, given that the Jones Massive were away on a much loved holiday. A week away over half-term, somewhere up north and on the coast. Very windy, rainy and somewhat cold to boot, but that didn't put us off. I over pack for Thursday, so we're not short of coats and waterproofs. However, my T powers must have been a little off, because the Ever Lovely Mrs J had to nip in and by some extra scarfs and gloves for us all. Still, brief periods of horizontal rain aside, much fun was had by all. Forest parks, cream teas and long walks on the beach.

Our week away was also Mrs J's and my wedding anniversary. Not quite twenty years together, but we're getting there. I did manage to sneak some new jewelry into the luggage for her, because she's worth it. Not every wife is as cool nor as accepting and I feel very lucky to have found her. If I hadn't, I doubt I'd be as happy as I am, nor probably as tired, as my lovely kids like to keep me busy, bless 'em ;-)

Milestones

October was also another little anniversary. Back in 2005 I started this blog and, nine years later, I'm plodding along still. How life has changed. We've two kids now, both young, but certainly growing up into fantastic young people, and each very much, their own person. I'm a bit wider than I'd like to be, but that may be as much the holiday, as middle age. ;-)

Each time I prune the Blogs I Follow list, I feel a little sadness, that there's another one gone. I guess all things have their time, and maybe those who have stopped blogging, have other things to do with their lives. Maybe they are content with who they are, or are busy, that they don't have time for it. It's part of the reason I started the Our Different Journey story collection, although, perhaps, interviews would be more accurate. People come and go, yet having a record of those I've been lucky enough to meet, is for me, at least, good to have.

This month, Calie, she of T-Central fame, was kind enough to ask me to put a few words together about this blog and also about me. Well, the post is now up, so if you're a new reader: hello :-) As the post says, I thought it would be fairly easy to rattle off a few lines about what YATGB is and me.... but it wasn't. Part of me felt - and I still do - that this was a bit of an opportunity. I could blah on - as I am now - or, I could take the chance to put a message out. I'll let you read the post and make up your own minds.

Oh, one thing that made me chuckle, is that one of the T-Central bloggers, has taken three of my photos and it's a bit like a short history of the looks I've tried. I did like being a redhead, although I think a darker version would work. If you look from the right to the left, it looks like I've grown my hair out. Which, I think is quite an achievement seeing it's artificial.


Too fab for one gender? Then why decide!

In other news, a Facebook friend put a link up about The Mirror's article on being 'bi-gendered'. From a positive stance, I think the article is well written and is sympathetic. Props Ria (Ryan) and Krystal, her partner, on coming out. Also, to The Mirror for getting it right, IMHO, because the piece is a far cry, from some of the horror stories (pardon the pun), put out by other aspects of the media. There's video from a well known daytime TV programme too, which adds more and is worth a watch. Oh, you may need to enter your UK postcode (assuming this isn't on YouTube somewhere).

Rocking the goth look. x
Do I get the term? Hmm.... I'm not sure. Not from I don't believe it's a real thing, nor to snub Ria's own identification. Maybe I am old-fashioned and I'm Trans 2.0, and the next generation are Trans 3.0? There's a gap for a Star Trek gag if you can be bothered (to go fabulously where no one as gone before....!) :-) So, iffy gags aside, is being bi-gendered a bit like being trans-something-or-other (waves) and being out? If so, I think I can get my head around that. I am, for the most part, in the closet, but if being bi-gendered is the next wave for people who don't want to be full time A or B, then I think that's very cool. Whatever it is, good luck to the pair of them.

Thanks for reading,
Lynn
x

26 comments:

  1. Ooh!! A bandwagon!! Better jump onto it! :-)

    I thought of myself as being bi-gendered a few years ago before the term became more common. I could not identify with those who 'felt to be in the wrong body'. I could not identify with being just a male.

    There were many moments when I felt uncomfortable presenting as a male, but also when as Tanya as female. I guess like most of us, there are times when we want to present as the opposite gender but we do not have the opportunity at the time. Then occasionally when we do have the opportunity, there's a feeling of 'meh'. Not in the zone

    Having pushed the boundaries a little now in my normal social circles, being accepted as either him or her sort of defines the bi-gendered definition. But I think now I would label myself as gender fluid. So you may get her. You may get him. Usually you'll get a mixture to some extent. :-)

    In my mind, the 'transvestite' is dead. Long live the gender spectrum :-)

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    1. LOL! It's not an official bandwagon until Dave, or Tony, give a speech on it ;-)

      It's the first I've heard of the term, but then it's quiet up here in the East Midlands :-) If I've understood your (rather good) comment correctly, then I'm with you on - at least - occasional discomfort as appearing as a bloke. Sh**, it seems so restricting to be stuck in a suit at fancy dos, and yet, weekdays I'm quite happy to be jeans, t-shirt and 11pm shadow, 'cos dressing up takes a lot of effort.

      As to a mixture, I wonder how much of us is behavior and how much is 'core' personality? I've had it said that my mannerisms and language are a little different in bloke vs bird, but other than that....

      Maybe the 'TV' badge is on its way out. Maybe we (t folk) and society are moving on and one day (#dreams), it won't matter. There's a lovely thought, IMO.

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    2. I fully agree with you Tanya, I feel the same way, there is Abigale and Book within “me”. Both have time out and dictate what I do and how to interact with the world.
      And with the term “gender fluid”, I’ll drink to that!

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    3. Tracey - from Chameleons - once asked me if I thought 'Lynn' was another person. I was surprised by her question, because I'd never considered that option. Perhaps some do, although clearly, neither you, me, nor Tanya do.

      At least we won't be alone on the secure unit :-)

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    4. Ah Lynn, no we won't be alone, we will have so much fun trying to find out who and how many we are!

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    5. "We're gonna need a bigger boat." ;-)

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    6. Aye Aye Captain, if it be you want!

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  2. It was so much fun going back through your blog and finding those pictures, Lynn! OMG, it was really hard to choose just what pictures to feature. You look just lovely in all of them!

    Calie

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    1. I think there's a snap every two weeks, so at roughly 50 posts a year (minus holiday gaps!), there's quite a back catalog. Oh the vanity! :-)

      Thanks for the kind words and for featuring my guest post too.

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  3. I think I like the outfit on the right, trendy and a bit sassy .... plus showing off those legs of yours.

    Happy anniversary ..... :)

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    1. Thanks, Mrs. Kind words indeed.

      The funny thing is, I think that might be oldest photo of the three! Ah, the running battle between fashionable and stylish. :-) I was also a bit thinner then :-( Damn you cakes! :-)

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  4. Nine years, week in week out, is very impressive :) . Long may you continue. Because, yes, pruning the blog list is always kind of sad (as I said quite recently too). It's like friends who have moved away and you never see anymore.

    Yes, bigender is certainly a thing – and there's a forum here. There's always been the element of this, hasn't there? For instance, Northern Concord used to send out (perhaps still do) membership cards for "the both of you". Or was that just them reflecting the usual part-time, closeted identity, rather than a specifically dual one? I dunno. Certainly I've never felt like there were two of me.

    Dunno whether "transvestite" is on its way out either. Not in this country maybe, not with people like Eddie Izzard and Grayson Perry still claiming it for themselves. But labels aren't mutually exclusive, are they. I use several: transvestite, trans(*), cross-dresser, genderqueer, femme. Not bigendered though ;)

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    1. Thanks, Jonathan. How long this will run, I just don't know. I guess until I run out of things to say, or when no one is interested enough to comment (stop laughing at the back! :-) ).

      Ta for the forum link. I don't really do forums, but I'll have a look and see what's going on. Might meet some new people, which is always cool. I don't think it's [bigendered] is a new thing, as you say. Maybe it's slightly shiny and has that new car smell, but that may be the salesman using 'hir' mojo on us. :-) If it's new or not, welcome to the fold, along with everyone else under the trans* banner.

      I think TV is likely to be with us for some time. So long as people use it, it will stay. Plus, if Jo(e) Public 'get it', why throw more complicated terms at them? Sure, maybe they're more accurate, but sometimes, coming from the outside in, feels like wading through jargon and there's quite enough of that in all walks of life.

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  5. Just wanted to send big congratulations for the rightful recognition of your long-running super blog. I'm not sure this is really "yet another" T-Girl blog, but THE T-Girl blog, the one that didn't fall by the wayside. Keep up the good work, and the great looks, too. Sue x

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  6. Hi Sue and thank you. Hmm. Rhymes. :-)

    I will force myself not to be very British and do down your kind words..... Oh bugger, I can't do it :-) There are lots of other great trans blogs out there and I hope that they make the nine year mark. Only another fifty odd posts to hit the ten year mark! :-D

    PS: I still stand by my blog title ;-)

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    1. Of course you stand on it, not everyone has a five letter acronym as a blog title. And I agree with Alexis about the shoes you need a new pair to stand on it.
      [Ed: Lynn said stand "by" it]
      What?
      [Ed: She said stand "by" it, not "on" it!]
      Oh! well silly old me..
      [Ed: gawd..]

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    2. We really have no idea what your talking about, do we
      [Ed: No idea]
      See..

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    3. If you say 'the precious' I will officially freak out. ;-)

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    4. Lynn my dear, we have no intention of using the "P" word..
      But now we know how to freak you out! (he he)
      Make a note of that will you.
      [Ed: Gotcha]

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  7. First, if those pictures are over the course of nine years – you should not be wearing the same shoes in two pictures. Ohhh… the travesty.

    Second, you know I love talking about poses – nine years, sameish pose!!! Holy Effin’ Christmas!!! I need to throw some hot sauce in your panties the next time you go out. Spice it up!

    Third, and let’s be positive, and most importantly – congrats on bearing the flag of responsible trans blogging for nine years. That’s quite an achievement, especially for a British lass. I mean it doesn’t even involve drinkin’, so I’m surprised you've stuck with it.

    Forth, you know I luv ya right – so stick with it and make it ten years and then 20. I’ll keep readin’ if you keep writin’.

    Fifty, oh wait I meant fifth – time keeps moving doesn’t it, it’s a shame and a blessing. We definitely may not look as good as we used to, but in some ways we look better. Knowledge and time make us wise and more beautiful in many ways.

    Sixth, English desserts are less than stellar – so don’t reach for the empty boring calories and instead reach for a new sexy dress. I tell you what, it’s a much better feeling in the long run than carrying around that spare tire.

    Seventh, did I mention shoes – you need more. Lie, steal, cheat, whatever you have to do, find a way.

    Eighth, you are like a mold – No, not that you hang around in dark and wet corners, multiplying and breeding like a vile disease. No, your blog is an inspiration to others, to mold us other bloggers into writing our own blogs and carrying on.

    Ninth, and most importantly – it’s great to have a friend like you. Bother, there I went and got all sentimental on ya.

    Keep
    Calm
    And
    Blog
    On

    Hugs,
    Alexis

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    1. Alexis, this was just hilarious!

      I went back and checked out our girl's shoes. How could she?

      Calie

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    2. Yay! Maybe in nine years, you can feature my blog, and you'll have hundreds of shoe pictures to choose from. Cause if there's one nutrient that I'm not lacking, it's Vitamin Heels!!

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    3. I would love to have a guest post from you for T-Central. If you want to do it, I need it soon. calietg at yahoo

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    4. Can do. Do you have a theme in mind, or would you prefer me to just 'speak my brainz'? :-)

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    5. 1. I love those shoes. Killer heel, smallish platform and comfy too. What's not to like. In fairness, the gap between the two snaps was quite a few months. I blame the person picking the snaps ;-) Besides, there's a recession on and I'm sticking to that excuse ;-)

      3. I've got a fresh bottle of gin today. Happy days! Twas a gift for helping someone out at work. Mmmm. Gin.

      2. I am a British subject. One does not 'throw shapes', unless one is at a rave. You should know this, even as one of the Colonials. ;-)

      4. Thanks mrs

      5. With luck, yes. With a little more luck, and some common sense: style over fashion.

      6. But, but, but. Custard!! Or custard & cream *sob*. Even tho you are right about the calories. *sniff*

      7. True

      8. LOL

      9. Thanks Mrs. You're not so bad yourself ;-)

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