"And then I'm happy for the rest of the day, safe in the knowledge that there will always be a bit of my heart devoted to it."

Hey all,

I don't know if you get this or not, but there are times when there are so many thoughts rattling around in my old brain, that it's difficult to really know to start. Okay.... deep breath and concentrate, Lynn... and stop talking to yourself too. People talk as it is. :-)

Shall we start with good stuff? This Thursday was Chameleons and as I hadn't taken ill or broken anything (yay!), off I went. In time honoured tradition, it was a case of two outfits, but on this occasion, three sets of boots as I really couldn't make my mind up. Ditzy eh? ;-) I was a little late than usual because I got caught up with work, but that was no great shakes and despite being slow getting there, oddly I was still the first to arrive.

Getting changed, perhaps unusually, is a time for a good old chat about various things. Sue (honestly: I'm terrible with names) popped in to say hi as she spotted the lights on upstairs. She was sporting a new wig and looking v nice too. We chatted while I did my face. Always a slightly strange experience; being stood in your guy clothes sans shirt (Ed: those tell tale make-up marks, eh tubby? :-P ) while you sort your slap out. Anyhoo, another lady - well, lass I guess at 20 something drifted in from Sheffield way. No, I can't remember her name either and I don't know what's worse: not remembering, or not remembering and then asking. Oops. :-) Anyways, time rolled along, so Alison and Maddy came in too. I ended up being mother hen (again) talking to Foxy 20s T-Girl about how to put a wig on, swapping boob tape tips with Maddy and then padding with Sue. Honestly, I don't really think I know what I'm doing and - with no false modesty - I don't consider myself to be an expert. I suppose with a few years your corset - sorry, belt - I guess you work out what works for you and if folk like that approach, so it goes.

I'd just about finished getting ready and then Mrs Alison dropped in to say we had a visitor. There had been a few emails in the group's inbox: two from students doing projects. They'd asked to come along and why not? Anyway, the young lady in question had come along as she was doing a project on the concept of love. For you witty folk at the back, no, not the egocentric self-love that some of us have.... and shame on you for thinking that too. ;-)

No, this was about relationships and Miss C wanted to talk to a few of us and, if possible, arrange to make some portrait shots for an art installation. I hope I've got the latter right! I did say to her that while most of us would be happy to help with her questions, getting candidates for a public gallery may be difficult. Yes, I do appreciate the irony of me saying no and then posting a picture on this blog. However, I feel that here, it's far more hidden and really (hopefully?) folk would have to be digging through the t'interwebs to find me here. If my gurning visage was to grace a local art gallery, that's a little different, so for me: it was a no. I did say that if we could do something artistic and avoid including my face, I'd be open to it, but that was a no-no.

So Miss C and I chatted a little about her project and why she'd decided to do what she did. From what I recall, she'd spoken to a few folks at Derbyshire Friend, a few gay people and she was working her way through the various parts of society. We talked about how long the Ever Lovely Mrs Jones and I had been together (many excellent years), when I told her about me being trans-something-or-other, how she took it and what effect, if anything, it had on our relationship. In all honesty, there are times when the trans stuff annoys - and I mean me as well as Mrs J. Yet, and please forgive me if I've said this before, but being trans, it's not just about make-up, photos and fancy frocks... or partying and Facebook. To be serious for a mo, I feel it's something that goes right through your core and helps make you, you.

I would like to think being trans makes me more sympathetic to minorities. I mean, the whole wanting to be treated fairly, not being stared at and just being able to get on in life. I would hope that being trans also makes me a little more understanding towards women. Now, please don't think I consider myself to be a woman, I'm a bloke and I always will be. Yet, when you're out and about and you see a group of rowdy men, there's that little part of you that thinks what if they get violent? Fashion, lovely though some of it is, it's not always comfortable and with clothes being fitted, there's a pressure - perhaps from within (no pun intended) - to stay trim. Does that mean I experience sexism / the glass ceiling, or understand women? No, I very much doubt it. I only see the issues from the side, quite possibly through the lens of being trans and no doubt that distorts the picture somewhat..... Yet all that said, it doesn't stop me being emphatic towards the issues people face.

Moving off the soap box and back on to what else has been happening, a few of us decided to go to the pub afterwards. Honestly, with the day I'd had at work earlier, I needed a bit more R & R time to reset my head and remind me that life's better with friends rather than project deadlines. The pub delivered that rather well. The four of us - Emma, Maddy, Sophie and I - crashed out on the comfy sofas while the music played on. We had a chat with a somewhat drunken lad who'd been falling around the pool table. It was karaoke night, so Maddy and I were soon in the queue to maul - sorry, perform - our take on Blur's Parklife. I had a chat with the DJ - lovely lady - about first albums (mine was Blur, her's was quite a bit earlier!) while she found our choice.

Maddy mockney'd it up with some gor blimey, guv'nur rap while I attempted a spot of singing. Regards of the vocal quality, the rest of the pub started to join in and the place was really going for it by the end. A quality experience. By sheer good fortune, the DJ played Song 2 straight afterwards and dancing queen that I am, how could I resist? After a leap around to that, I was on cloud nine.

With our little turn done, it was off into the night to head home and off to bed. What a cracking night. Batteries fully charged. Thanks, girls. <<>>

Take care,
Lynn

[ Today's lryic: Parklife by Blur... and top news on the Life Time Award from the Brits. ]

"I left my head and my heart on the dance floor."

Hi,

A day late with the post. Tut tut! :-)

Okay, I could say I'd planned to upload a scheduled post, but in the words of Mr Callahan; "Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself." Really, one of the best quotes from prime-minster's question time. (Ed: That was Callaghan. Honestly! Look out, Lynn's about to go into a day dream about Dirty Harry running the country during the 70s!!)

Where was I? Oh aye, a scheduled post. Yeah, I had planned to do it, but... umm... two things got in the way. A) My complete inability to prioritise and B) how would I tell you how good last night's Invasion was? :-) I'm sticking with B as my answer. Yes, final answer if we're staying with the pop culture references.

So.... having not been up to going to Chameleons last time (Ed: booo!) I was all geared up for a big night out and Invasion delivered that in spades. Now, that is a funny saying. I could understand it if it was 'in buckets' or 'via a delivery truck'. Honestly, when has anything arrived by spade? Well, unless we're talking about cleaning up (in a Steptoe stylee) after a horse. Oh dear, we've drifted off again.... I blame the meds. ;-)

Invasion! Yes. Umm. I'd managed to get my outfit choices down to two - which isn't bad going for yours truly. Okay, maybe two and a half as I wasn't 100% on my choice of hosiery. Despite being late home from work - which (understandably) wasn't appreciated that well, I was into the Dad routine running - dog walk, bath, story, bedtime kisses, etc - before making my way to Sophie's place around eight-ish. Bless her, she'd offered me the option of getting changed at her place, so a fist full of win: we share a car and get to chat while faffing about.

Now, orange dress or wrap dress? Umm... Wrap dress. Pink or black tights? Panic!! Black or pink tights? Black! Shoes or boots? Faff... shoes! :-) You get the picture. I decided to pass on risking false eyelashes and much as I do like a bit of glamour on a night out, I didn't want to make us late - no, later! - and I'd bodged the application last time. Clearly, more practise is required! Now suitably fab, Sophie and I headed off to New Foresters to catch up with the rest of the Invaders. Luckily for us, there was a car parking space right outside, so no need to bother with a coat and off we went.

The evening was very good and I bumped into various folk (in no particular order): Emma, Kate, Alex, Sam, Maddy, Jonathan, Chrystal, Penny, Tiff, Gabrielle and at that point, my memory buffer for names + faces ran out. If I have missed your name, sorry! Time didn't fly away, so there was plenty of chance to have a chat and mingle. I had a heart to heart with a good friend (no names) and Miss X, I hope your luck changes soon. <<>> Oh another note, I'm not a massive fan of pubs per say, but maybe it's a case of not having found the right one. Foresters has a fab atmosphere and you can be in the thick of it, or chilling out on the sofas. Good times!

As the clock rolled round to the next hour, we headed off to a club. It was a tad cold out, but as it wasn't far and I've braved worse (Ed: probably twenty years ago and if you're clubbing, taking a coat is just a pain.). There was a brief chat with the club's manager - in a positive way - and we were inside. The music was loud and I think I recognised about two songs while dancing away madly. Everyone seemed so young, but maybe it's me getting on! :-D Next time I'll pack ear-plugs. There was no trouble and for once, the trans massive weren't the ones in the highest heels. Everyone was really cool with us and that just added to the night.

It wasn't long before the witching hour approached and it was time to head home. I climbed into bed just after one and I woke up - as in bang, you're back in the room - at 8am sharp. Now how come I can't do that during the working week? Body clocks eh? ;-)

Take care,
Lynn

[ Today's lyric: Telephone by Lady GaGa... which was on Let's Dance earlier tonight and the soap actresses  rocked it! ]